"Yeah, but sure..."

Irish traits

Mysteries of the Irish house

Taps (faucets)

 The taps in the bathroom are separate, hot on left, cold on the right. You have to make warm water in your hands, and it's a bit onerous. It would be easy to send them through the same tap. They do that in the kitchen. Why not in the bathroom?

Fill the sink, they say, if you need warm water. For this, you should keep the bowl clean (and still have the plug.) If you normally use the sink, it becomes unsanitary quickly.

It used to be this type of arrangement prevented backflow from the hot-water apparatus into the municipal pipes. This is not necessary with modern plumbing hardware. The practice of installing such fixtures is apparently based only upon tradition.


• The lightswitches are "on" when the button is pressed bottom-side in.

• If a set of two light-switches are placed on a panel outside a room, the switch furthest from the room usually works for that room's light.

• A lightswitch outside of a bathroom seems like a bad idea. Sure, it's easier - for everybody, including the mischievous.


• Door handles are rather sharp levers, which can easily stick into the pocket of a hoodie or catch in one's folded cuff. They look good, and they open a door with an easy downstroke. But they are hazardous to clothing.

• Internal doors are still built with skeleton-key locks.

The American-Irish comedian Des Bishop did a bit about the immersion, in which he theatricalized the anxiety of leaving the device turned on.

However dire the consequences, this worry is deeply ingrained in the Irish psyche, and the Bishop routine is famous in Ireland. It's a cliche, really, a worn-out cultural touchstone. It's probably also the reason most people visit this page.


It seems that few Irish houses have a good shower. Of the older houses, none were fitted with anything like a normal water heater. The Irish counterpart is the old "immersion," and these are common. An immersion is an electric water heater without thermostat. You have to switch it on for a while before you use it — and remember to turn it off afterwards. One common alternative is the wall-mounted electric on-demand unit. It can be loud, is often hard to adjust, and may fluctuate in temperature.

Skirting (baseboards)

The skirting* at the base of a wall in the Irish house is normally applied as part of the general construction before the flooring surface is placed.

In some cultures, the function of skirting is to close the space between the flooring and the wall. A great craftsman can trim the flooring material so that the difference is negligible — but nobody can prevent it. And that's what skirting is for.

In most new Irish houses, the skirting is installed flat upon the concrete base-floor — apparently just because there's supposed to be skirting. Then comes the flooring, and the gap that the skirting would cover.

Now there are two options. You can live with the uneven gap between the skirting and flooring (and slowly fill it with dust and other crap) or you can place another molded wooden strip along the edge. This wooden strip, or "beading," performs the function for which in other cultures the skirting is intended.

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* A "skirtin' ladder" is one of the fools' errands on an Irish construction site. These are "items" which sound plausible but are ridiculous when you know they're a joke. Preferably the toolshed attendant will recognize the piss-take and your victim will return initiated. A skirtin' ladder, a bucket of steam, a "long stand" ...

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